Thou Shalt Not Text

You put your cell phone in; you put your cell phone out;
You put your cell phone in your mouth 
And you shake it all about.
You put your Twitter in; you put your Twitter out….

To be sung to the tune of “The Hokey Pokey” 

June 2019 was “busting out all over” when a New England bishop (who will remain nameless because he has done some good things like supporting the rights of immigrants on the US southern border and stricter gun control laws) re-placed himself in “an occasion of sin for me and others.”  Seems in July 2018 the good bishop said “good-bye” to his Twitter account – almost four months after opening it.

The bishop wrote:

A final tweet. Sadly, Twitter has become a major distraction
for me, on good days and bad, an obstacle to my spiritual life,
an occasion of sin for me and others. So, good-bye.
If I’ve offended anyone, I’m truly sorry.
If I’ve helped anyone along the way, thank God.

In almost Trumpian style, he fired off nearly 400 tweets to his 6,100 subscribers in the four months before dropping out – briefly making him the most active American prelate on the social media platform.     

A Washington Post article noted the bishop’s decision may have been a result of the backlashes he experienced after defending US bishops and the American Church following horrific allegations against District of Colombia Cardinal Theodore McCarrick, who was defrocked by Pope Francis.

In an exercise of Twitter jibber-jabber, the bishop wrote:

If you find a perfect church out there somewhere, 
by all means, join it. But remember, the moment you
join it, it will cease being perfect.

Unfortunately, the bishop didn’t learn his lesson and stay off Twitter, even after being roundly lessoned by Michael Brendan Dougherty of The National Review:

[The bishop’s] tweets read as the shrug of a man who long since gave up on the idea of actually protecting the flock from the wolves, and has taken to telling the surviving sheep not to be too disheartened that their friends and children continue to be devoured by his colleagues.

The bishop gave in to the “occasion of sin for me and others” and returned to Twitter right on time to acknowledge Pride Month 2019:

A reminder that Catholics should not support or attend LGBT 
“Pride Month” events held in June. They promote a culture and encourage
activities that are contrary to Catholic faith and morals.
They are especially harmful for children.

In all fairness, just a year before his Pride Month babble, the bishop indicated to Christopher White of Crux: Taking the Catholic Pulse that he had some modicum of personal insight: “I need a heavy dose of prudence in things that I post, because I don’t use a lot of filters.”

That’s the problem with addictions – even to Twitter: In addiction (and/or a personal conviction that one knows more and better than anyone else) one gives up “a heavy dose of prudence” and does not “use a lot of filters.” 

Having insulted gay men and women struggling to overcome generations of prejudice and physical violence against them, having again pierced the hearts of good, traditional Catholic parents who struggle with the unscientific teachings of the Church they love and their love of their sons and daughters, having said to children and teenagers and young adults that there is something wrong them and their emotions, the bishop took his clue from televangelists caught in adultery and politicians and leaders of industry – the strong and powerful - who have been exposed as physical, emotional and sexual abusers: 

I regret that my comments yesterday about Pride Month have turned out to be so controversial in our community, and offensive to some, especially the gay community. That certainly was not my intention, but I understand why a good number of individuals have taken offense. I also acknowledge and appreciate the widespread support I have received on this matter.

The Catholic Church has respect and love for members of the gay community, as do I. Individuals with same-sex attraction are beloved children of God and our brothers and sisters. 

As a Catholic Bishop, however, my obligation before God is to lead the faithful entrusted to my care and to teach the faith, clearly and compassionately, even on very difficult and sensitive issues. That is what I have always tried to do - on a variety of issues - and I will continue doing so as contemporary issues arise.

As the gay community gathers for a rally this evening, I hope that the event will be a safe, positive and productive experience for all. As they gather, I will be praying for a rebirth of mutual understanding and respect in our very diverse community.

No, Bishop. Pain-inflicting not “controversial” or “offensive.”  “I understand why a good number of individuals have taken offense.” No you don’t – not unless you’ve gone to some of the high schools and colleges – even the Catholic high schools and colleges of your diocese, to PFLAG and other groups and sat for hours actually listening and maybe even talking with – not at – that “good number of individuals [who] have taken offense.” But, of course, you can pat yourself on the back by citing “the widespread support” you’ve received. The humility is impressive. 

Bishop, if you really want to show your “love and respect” for all the people of your diocese, learn that Pride Month doesn’t simply honor “individuals with same-sex attraction.” It is designed to recognize bi-sexual and transsexual men and women, to honor their families and those who support them in your state and in your – our – Church and to say to them that they are genuinely “beloved children of God and our brothers and sisters.”

Good Bishop, forget about appreciating “the widespread support” you’ve received from folks who, perhaps like you, would never go to a Pride event or, even worse, who would mock, oppress and diminish the humanity of our LGBT brothers and sisters. The “contemporary issues” of the LGBTQ community did not “arise” recently. [The Stonewall riots were fifty-three years ago.] 

Good Bishop, in the words of “Mr. Dooley,” a fictional 19th Century Chicago Irish bartender (who would himself have been the target of anti-Catholic hatred and prejudice) you are called to be one who “comforts th’ afflicted, afflicts th’ comfortable.” 

So, Bishop, here’s a few suggestions for you. Someday soon take off your Roman collar and pectoral cross, put on a casual polo shirt and slacks, and drive yourself to a meeting with men and women, adolescents and their parents who know one hell of a lot more than you do about LGBT life and struggles and spend three or four hours – maybe even have lunch or finish the afternoon with beer and pizza – and listen to their stories.

Bishop (and all your brother bishops), at the risk of you being offended if you ever read this, please allow me a version of an old parable (You remember parables; Jesus used them.) But, first, some context.

There’s a great AA meeting here in town – the South Miami Men’s Group. I frequently send students and non-students with the admonition “They can save your life.” Of course, I also advise them “Keep quiet and listen. If you say ‘I think…’ they will quickly tell you they ‘don’t care what you think. Your best thinking got you here. So, take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mouth. You have two ears and one mouth for a reason.’” 

Once upon a time, on a Thursday night in June, which just happened to be Pride Month, a well-known bishop who had studied at the famed Pontifical North American College (a training school for bishops) and the famed Pontifical Gregorian University and the famed Pontifical Atheneum of St. Anselm – all in Rome, so everyone knew him to be quit pontifically framed – went to a local college bar that just happened to be celebrating its LGBTQ students.

On arrival, he announced “I am a famed pontifical bishop and I have come to see what you can teach me.” After advising the bishop to ditch his collar and cross “’cause it can get rowdy around here and you don’t want to get beer on ‘em,” one of the students grabbed a clean glass and added “let me pour you a beer.”

With all the skill of a graduate student, the young man starting pouring. The glass got full, but he continued to pour. As froth and beer ran over the rim and onto the table, the pontifically framed bishop began to order, “Stop, stop! Can’t you see the glass is full. You’re spilling beer all over the table and the floor.” “It’s the same as you,” the students responded in chorus (or was it a choir?). “You came here telling us you want to learn from us about our lives and our experience, but the glass is already full of your opinions and decisions and judgments about us, - that we are ‘intrinsically disordered’ - and whom and the way we love is ‘wrong’ and ‘sinful.’” 

Then, Bishop, schedule half a day to meet with the leading medical professionals of New England dealing with issues of gender and orientation and listen while they tell you just how much more complex the issues are than anything theology is presently prepared to deal with. 

Finally, if you dare, have your secretary make some phone calls and set-up some appointments for you with publicly “out” Episcopalian bishops and priests or even some of your own priests who are gay but not “out,” and listen.

But before you do that rip-up that “I regret” letter that you essentially copied from some ignominious TV preachers and adulterous politicians and permanently and forever cancel your Twitter account. 

And, good Bishop, during this election period have the humility and intellectual honesty to remain silent, because you and all your theology know almost nothing about the sexuality and morality of your LGBT Faithful. And almost anything you say will be used to continue justifying oppressing and persecuting these “beloved children of God and our brothers and sisters.”