Mojitos With The One
(Divina Inspiratione New Service. Islamorada, Florida – November 4, 2022)
A scrum of international reporters –
summoned by predawn calls to their unlisted
cell phones - gathered on Wednesday
at Morada Bay on this mid-Keys island
for an historic 3:00 p.m. interview.
The Divina Inspiracione representative
filed this pre-American-election report.
Two long wooden tables had been pulled together on the white sand Florida Bay beach that is a feature of The Beach Cafe, an outdoor Mediterranean bistro in the Florida Keys. As the invited guests arrived, seating for seven appeared to assigned by reporters’ notebooks and mini-recorders.
“Ladies and gentlemen, please have a seat,” thundered a voice that came from no particular direction. “We’ve scheduled this meeting for midafternoon to avoid crowds and paparazzi. There’s mojitos at your places and we’re sure you’ll enjoy our selection.”
Three barefoot servers with massive trays crossed the sand and, after placing heaping platters on the table, took their places at the empty chairs – the three without notebooks or recorders.
_____
“Well,” began the senior-most, “You’re wondering why you’re here.
“I’m God.
“Actually, We’re God. For some, We are the ‘Three-in-One’ and for others We’re just ‘The One.’ I’m the Creator God. In the center is ‘The Son,’ called ‘Jesus.’ And, at the other end of the table, is ‘The Spirit,’ ‘the Holy Spirit.’
“With just days to go before your election, We want to set the record straight – at least give you Our – My – perspective.
“We’ve been here from ‘the beginning’ and We – I – have seen it all.”
“Wooooo!,” exclaimed the reporter from the Association of Presses. “Are we being punked? What’s happening? Where are the cameras?”
“No,” responded the Jesus waiter. “Serious as a heart attack – if you’ll pardon the phrase.
“We’ve just been watching what’s going on with your election and what folks have been saying and I – We – have some things to say.”
“Unless they actually read it, most American voters don’t even know that their Constitution doesn’t have a single reference to Me – Us,” declared the Holy Spirit. “And your First Amendment is about the establishment of religion:
"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof;
“Those men – and, by the way they were all men – just wanted to make certain that no religion – and that also means ‘no faith’ – Judaism, Islam, Christianity in all its forms, Hinduism, Santeria, Wicca, Buddhism, you name it – became the faith or religion of the United States; they meant NO.”
“You’ve got all these folks now calling for ‘a Christian nation,’” said The Spirit. “’Christian’ is like an umbrella – just about anybody can gather under it. It’s almost a word without meaning,
“Want proof?” The Spirit queried rhetorically. “You’ve got more ‘non-denominational’ Christian churches than Moses could have shaken a stick at.
“Now ‘Catholic,’ that has a meaning. Like Ferdinand and Isabella – the ‘Catholic monarchs’ of Spain. For religion’s sake they killed hundreds, imprisoned thousands and expelled tens of thousands. How’s that for a ‘Christian nation’?
“And Henry VIII. He’d tell you his was a ‘Christian nation’ and he a ‘good Christian ruler.’ That didn’t work out too well for Anne Boleyn and Catherine Howard.
“Folks, eat up. We’ll make sure your recorders pick-up every word We say. The ceviche is excellent; coconut fried shrimp is the best in the Keys; we’ve ordered group sandwiches for everyone; don’t let the conch fritters get cold. And there’s Key lime pie for dessert – we’re in the Keys.”
Reporters had been getting a workout moving their micro recorders from one member of the Trinity to the other, all while making notes about historic issues they needed to double check. “Yeah. One of Henry’s great lines was ‘I do not choose anyone to have it in his power to command me, nor will I ever suffer it.’ He said that before he decided how he was going to make his a ‘Christian’ realm where he had religious power to command. Now that’s chutzpah,” said The Spirit.
“Here’s a great quote,” said The Creator. “See if you know where it’s from:
‘We see many of the Euro-Atlantic countries are actually rejecting their roots, including the Christian values that constitute the basis of western civilization. They are denying the moral principles and all traditional identities: national, cultural, religious and even sexual.’”
Members of the press gaggle exchanged puzzled looks, not wanting to offer the wrong answer to The One.
“Vladimir Putin. Yup,” declared The Divine, “and he’s the one whom Patriarch Karill of the Russian Orthodox Church, the largest in Orthodox Christianity, once called a ‘miracle of God.’ Just look at what’s happening in Ukraine and you know he’s not one of My – Our – miracles.”
“We’ve always been big fans of your Thomas Jefferson,” noted The Spirit. “Actually, he’s one of My favorites, ‘cause he read History and Philosophy and studied and thought. I stayed out of the whole thing. I – We - didn’t ‘inspire’ your Declaration of Independence or Constitution. There was no need when you already had educated men and women – thinkers. Jefferson used his life of study to produce your Declaration of Independence in just three days. He believed
"setting up their own opinions and modes of thinking as the only true and infallible, and as such endeavoring to impose them on others, hath established and maintained false religions over the greatest part of the world and through all time"
“And he wrote:
‘to compel a man to furnish contributions of money for the propagation of opinions which he disbelieves and abhors, is sinful and tyrannical… no man shall be compelled to frequent or support any religious worship, place, or ministry whatsoever, nor shall be enforced, restrained, molested, or burthened in his body or goods, nor shall otherwise suffer, on account of his religious opinions or belief; but that all men shall be free to profess, and by argument to maintain, their opinions in matters of religion, and that the same shall in no wise diminish, enlarge, or affect their civil capacities.’”
“Jefferson didn’t write the Constitution; he was in France when James Madison penned that document,” noted The Creator. “But too many Americans forget that the man who gave you your Constitution and its Bill of Rights, who was influenced by Jefferson, also wrote:
‘The settled opinion here is that religion is essentially distinct from Civil Government, and exempt from its cognizance; that a connexion between them is injurious to both; that there are causes in the human breast, which ensure the perpetuity of religion without the aid of the law….’
“And in 1819 - years after the Constitution and its Bill of Rights were established as law, Madison wrote
‘a legal establishment of religion without a toleration could not be thought of, and with toleration, is no security for public quiet and harmony, but rather a source itself of discord and animosity.’"
“Can I say something,” Jesus asked.
“I keep calling you Americans a ‘fade nation.’ Fades come and fades go. But they’re like tsunamis for you folks. They come in waves.
“Remember the WWJD wrist band?
“Wow! That was popular. ‘What Would Jesus Do.’ A politician’s ‘must have’ accessory.
“Trouble is that’s a question not a slogan, not a promise or pledge or political party plank. WWJD was meaningless. It still is.
“What Would Jesus Do? He would feed the hungry, give drink to the thirsty – not make people stand in voting lines for hours without allowing people of Faith to bring them food or water.
“He would abolish the death penalty, because that is being pro-life not pro-birth.
“He would say, ‘Father’s love your children. Don’t use and abuse and then abandon women whom you impregnate and then become nothing more than an image on television or a photo in a sports magazine for your kids.’
“He would say, ‘Don’t hold yourself out as a model of American manhood when you cannot be faithful to your wife and children or you’re on your third or fourth marriage. Admit that you’re a serial adulterer who sometimes marries the women with whom you betray your wife and family.’
“He would say, ‘The laborer is worthy of his wage. And that doesn’t mean that the boss or the CEOs or the COOs deserve to earns two- and three- and four-hundred times more than the factory worker without whose calloused hands their company would be worthless.’
“He would say, ‘Treat the sick and the broken as you say you would treat Me. They deserve the same medical care and health insurance, the same mental health care as people of wealth and power.’
“He would say, ‘He loves the man or woman who has been injured or traumatized in the service of freedom and human rights and they deserve the same lifelong care as any member of Congress.’
“He would say, ‘I am a Jew; My ancestors, who gave the world the gift of monotheism and a relationship with the One God, were Jews; My parents were Jews; My disciples and friends were Jews; the millions of those killed in the Shoah were Jews like Me. You cannot call yourself Christian unless you are willing to be grateful for the heritage you have received from Jews.’
“He would look across this table at The Creator and give thanks for the gift of this Universe and this Earth and He would say to the voter ‘You have a moral obligation – to your Creator and all the generations to come – to protect this gift of the Universe and this Earth.’”
Just then, the youngest reporter at the table, who was slightly but safely mojito-ized (The Divine knew he would not be driving and it was only his second.) dared to speak.
“Why? Why here? Why us? Why now?” His question rolled across the table.
“Why is easy,” answered the Creator. “Y’all are young enough that you’ll have a story to tell for generations. Here? Just take in the view. Besides, it’s fun to eat a great meal in bare feet on the sand.”
“Now?” began The Spirit. “Now because We inspired the Psalmist to write ‘From unjust and deceitful people deliver my, O God’ (Psam 43) We can’t even count the unjust and deceitful politicians who are spreading lies about stolen elections, fake voters, claiming that We told them to run for office or how to vote or that We inspired them.”
“If folks want to know what We say, try “Be still and know that I am God (Psalm 46),” added The Creator. “Now that’s inspired.
“Or ‘This alone, O man, does the Lord ask of you, this, my child and nothing more: To act justly, to love tenderly and to walk humbly with your God.’(Micah 6:8)
“So, the next time someone uses My – Our – name as part of their campaign, just think of a four-letter word that begins with L and ends with A-R.”
“Friends,” The Spirit said, “It’s getting late. We hope you enjoyed lunch. This is one of our favorite places to get together with folks. There’s still some grouper sandwiches for you to take home. Drive safely.”
And, with that the Trinity of servers disappeared.